So what has me stressed? Our other adoption. Sigh.
CPS chose us to be Micah's mom and dad, brother and sisters. They read our file. We had no secrets. They chose us. I never promised to keep Micah in school indefinitely. They knew we were a homeschooling family. Our caseworker said we think so outside the box that we would never get a child and yet Od laughed and here Micah is, our son. When he came home I fully intended to send him to public school. Just think how easy it would be. He would be gone most of the day. I wouldn't have to change diapers or anything. How easy. Then the specialists, the ped, the therapists all said he needs to be at home not in public school. This would be best for a child that has had no medical care, no therapy, was starved and abused in foster care and is currently functioning on about a 2 to 2.5 year old level. Could I really do it? Could I each Jim? Dal with him all day? Up until this int we weren't really bonding. I mean I never saw him and the school gave us no communication other than how "bad" he was, every single day.
I started asking for a waiver to homeschool. The answer was a quick and firm no. Funny, I had ask for medical records and our caseworker sent messages to them about the foster home Micah was in and what doctors were saying but they never answered the phone or email then. But I ask for one thing and I get an immediate no. Do I stop there? No. I sent them the letter from the genetics doctor who sees Micah. They tell me thanks but no. As if to satisfy me or pass the buck they say they will have their doctor look at the note and decide.
So I call. I get a personal cell phone number and I call. The supervisor of Micah's deadbeat caseworker answers. Now we will talk, finally, after 3 months of silence. I ask her the most important question first. So this doctor that you will have decide if Micah should be homeschooled, has he seen Micah? No, she answers. Ok. So how does a man who has no speciality in children, or children with Down syndrome, and who has never seen my son, get to decide to agree or disagree with a specialist that is my sons doctor, is prominent in the world of Down syndrome and has examined and also had a psych eval for my son??? * As a side note this same supervisor said that my son has no medical records because he was never taken to the doctor.*
Enter lawyers. Yes, I called the lawyers for the homeschool coalition of Texas. I was tired of the bull that CPS was trying to feed me. They were wonderful to me. I found out that the commissioner of CPS for the state of Texas said I am entitled to a waiver because Micah is in permanent situation or a situation leading to permanency. So here's the change of command as I see it, caseworker, caseworker supervisor, supervisor, asst. commissioner, commissioner. Now the commissioner doesn't even know I requested a waiver because the request is being stopped at the supervisor. She says no and that's final they say. Nope. Not by law. The lawyers say the only reason I don't have a waiver is because I have an anti homeschooling caseworker. Yup. A caseworker, cw supervisor, and supervision who has not so much ask about how my child is doing in the last 3 months.
Enter State Rep.
I had enough. The stress alone is taking its toll on me. I know have a uti from not driving anything, I am barely eating and my other kids education is taking a back seat because I have to fight this and fight the school. I made the call to the state rep who helped us bring Micah home. They were very upset that CPS is not doing what is best for Micah. That CPS has not checked on him as they were suppose to. I told her they refused to acknowledge our concerns or look into the foster family that we know abused him. She is gang to be giving them a call.
As I fight for what is best for my child I am constantly reminded that if I don't shut up and stop fighting then they will take him from me. They have done it before and won't hesitate to do it again. CPS likes to prove they can't be beaten, they can't be stopped and what they say goes. They are bullies. Bullies who hide behind their title. Saying this can get my son removed from home. You don't think that scares me? We in CPS custody he had no medical care, no therapy, was abused and mistreated, was looked at like he would never amount to anything because he was in their words "retarded." In CPS custody he was given to a foster family who told us he would probably "outgrow his Down syndrome" and was in a school where he had no educational goals in his IEP and was strapped to a chair in school (seen by the caseworker and put in his report like it was no big deal).
Since being in our family Micah has stopped having diarrhea 10x a day like foster mom said. He has had an exam from the ped, the eye specialist, the genetics doctor, has started therapy for speech and is finally off the wait list and ready to start pt and ot. He has had several tests done that children with Down syndrome need to have. His thyroid was checked and he has seen the allergy doctor and has been tested for allergies. He has several upcoming blood tests. He has had an X-ray for his neck per the doctors orders because in kids with DS you have to check one of the vertebrae to be sure everything is ok. The eye specialist says he needs tear duct surgery and has a stigmatism and both should have been taken care of years ago. GI says he may need a scope to figure out why he had so much diarrhea but our thoughts are he was malnourished and fed junk food. If you give him too much sugar he will have diarrhea.
He came to us showing signs of abuse, all forms of abuse if you get my understanding. He bite, hit, stole food and acted out in a manner no 6 year old should know. Foster mom and CW said he was non verbal. Micah does not show any of those behaviors anymore. Also his speech is amazing. He is very verbal right now. If you ask him to repeat you he will. Potty training was never on the foster family's list to do. Here he goes on the potty, not trained yet but getting better each day. Micah has an incredible fear of dark places, doorways and locks on doors. Beyond a logical fear. We are working with him to make him understand he is safe. When people come over that he thinks are caseworkers he gets very nervous and wants me to leave. He won't go near them or talk to them.
Micah was on the football team and completed his first season. He made many friends and even scored a touchdown. Next we want to try horse back riding. His life with us isn't perfect but it is a good one. He calls us mom and dad, he will pick things up and say "Micah's?!" He knows he belongs here. AJ is his best friend and little teacher. The other day I overheard her,"what Micah? Say the whole thing...go..out..side..to..play..with..me. Ok yes let's go play!" She sits in on every therapy with him. They use the iPad together and she teaches him how to do things he didn't know how to. The other day I saw her hand over hand with him helping him with an app. What a beautiful relationship that is enriching both their lives. And yet CPS would dare to say shut up or I will take him away.
What grounds do they have? Why did they take away another couples two children simply for standing up to them? Now I have to say I wasn't told by CPS directly it was more indirectly thorough another worker. I should not have to live with this fear. And who is giving this fear? 2 Timothy 1:7 tells us God doesn't give the Spirit of fear, but the Spirit of Power, Love and a Sound mind. Then who gives us this fear if it isn't God? Satan. Why would he give me fear? To make me stop doing what is right. All it takes for evil to prosper is for good people to do nothing.
I want CPS to know it isn't my intention to fight. I have better things to do. It isn't my intention to harm them or make them look bad or even the process of adoption out of state care look bad. I believe when done right and cw actually do their job and make the child a priority it is an amazing program. Ever orphan deserves a loving home no matter where they live. What I. Am trying to do is what the doctors say is best for our child. What I know is best for him. After all isn't that what they want me to do and why they chose me to be his mama? I want him to have the best life possible.
I wanted to put it out there so that others know our situation and story and if they do come after us all this is out there. If they think I am a bother now oh boy do they not want to mess with my children. Please pray for us. This is very stressful. We have the law in our side, the commissioner of CPS on our side and doctors and documentation on our side. Most importantly we have God on our side.
I believe before Micah was even knit together in his mothers womb God chose him to be our son. I believe that adoption has redeemed this child. I believe God has a hope and a future for Micah and that satan does not want to see this happen. I believe that this is not a fight with flesh and blood alone but with the principalities of darkness. I believe that if God is for us who can ever stop us.
We have been attacked a lot lately and it is wearing very thin so please please pray for us. Pay for God's peace and provision and will in our situation. Pray that the hearts of the CPS workers involved in Micah's case would be turned toward God. Pray that this situation will be used for God's glory, because I ow my God never wastes a hurt.
Be blessed
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